on things which I am contrary about.

I really, really don't like The Beatles. My husband put a Beatles tape on in the car on my birthday, and it was like being stuck in elevator-music purgatory. Paul McCartney's cheeky, chirpy little voice just grates against my ear drums. I can just about bear some of the up-tempo numbers, but I've never wanted to go to an octopus's garden, and I've even less desire to hear Ringo droning on about it.

Ringo Starr needs to be reading stories about Thomas the Tank Engine, which I do enjoy. The Beatles back-catalogue can stay in room 101 as far as I'm concerned. I know, you're all shocked.

I also actually prefer the BBC productions of the Narnia books. I've seen the new films on ginormous screens, in full surround sound, and it's an exhilarating experience. I look forward to eventually seeing all seven books on the big screen.

But, I think the BBC films work harder to stay close to the plot line of the books, and more true to the characters CS Lewis presented. Edmund in the films is understandably seduced into betraying his brother and sisters, and you quite like him. In the telly production, he's a spiteful wotsit, who has his ego stroked by the White Witch and then doesn't want to go back into Narnia because his guilty conscience is pricking him. You see the wrestling he has with his conscience on the way to the castle of the Witch, and that he chooses to go with his sin.

I was quite ticked off by the portrayal of Peter in the recent Prince Caspian film. He's one of my favourite characters, and the plot changes they made did rather turn him into a petulant, arrogant fool. I understand why they did it, in terms of the length of the story for film, and the seeds in the original story (Peter leading them wrongly and ignoring Lucy having seen Aslan), but I think the extent to which they did it distorted the character of Peter. All very contemporary and all that, but like Faramir in another well-known adaptation, film-makers seem reluctant to give us men who are genuinely heroic and admirable.

I know the special effects are ropey, but I actually prefer the car-seat cover Aslan to the computer generated one, because the children can actually touch him, and I don't have a little thing in the back of my mind reminding me that they are just stroking air. There's an element of radio-play/stage-play to the telly episodes, which still requires you to use your imagination - the films have computer-generated everything, and it sometimes makes it so much less magical.

I'm sure there's some nostalgia mixed in with it, but that's why it works, because of the nostaliga I have for the books, too. I suppose I should just be grateful they didn't give the big screen movies a contemporary setting.

On who I am, and a dip into the archives.

I'm in a funny old place right now. An uncomfortable mix of grief, joy, sadness, anger, and general befuddlement. Lots of painful real life problems - some you know of, some I'm not at liberty to share, all really quite difficult and unpleasant. A friend of mine made a comment at her place that she is in the process of re-evaluating some things, in the wake of recent events. It made me smile, actually, because I thought some time ago that this particular sea change would come to her, and so it has.

I feel like there's a certain amount of change for me, too. I've thought of quitting the blog very recently, because I don't post as often as I used to, and life is very different to what it used to be. I'm no longer disabled, something I am very thankful for, but it means that I certainly don't get as much time to sit and blog!

In some senses, I feel as though I have compromised too much, and not been as faithful as I should have been in using my voice for God. Being depressed has sometimes left me bowed to the approval of others, which never bodes well. I find myself almost apologizing for things which actually, I believe with all my heart, and staying silent when I should speak.

But recent events have underlined for me that my identity is in Christ alone and His gospel of grace alone, through faith alone, authoritatively defined by scripture alone, all for the glory of God. That has a great many consequential beliefs, but the heart remains constant. I can't compromise on those things and stand before the Lord with clean hands.

My friends know (I hope) that I will always be honest with them, even when it is a painful thing to do. I'm sure some of them know that from the pain of it alone, and sometimes wish I would just shut up. Well, know this - my cause is Christ alone. It has to be, because nothing else on this earth will make a blind bit of difference, even if it appears to do so in temporal terms.

I sometimes worry about what would be the best thing to leave at the top of my blog, if I were to die tonight, what would best sum up who I am. In thinking about that, I recalled this post, and thought it was a good way to tie up all the recent upheaval and controversy with the most important message of all.

Thinking about infinitely better things

Went to church this morning, and it was my turn to stay in. There was a marvellous, Christ-saturated sermon, and these hymns.

Glorious things of thee are spoken,
Zion, city of our God!
He, whose Word cannot be broken,
Formed thee for His own abode.
On the Rock of Ages founded,
What can shake thy sure repose?
With salvation’s walls surrounded,
Thou may’st smile at all thy foes.

See! the streams of living waters,
Springing from eternal love;
Well supply thy sons and daughters,
And all fear of want remove:
Who can faint while such a river
Ever flows their thirst t’assuage?
Grace, which like the Lord, the Giver,
Never fails from age to age.

Round each habitation hovering,
See the cloud and fire appear!
For a glory and a cov’ring
Showing that the Lord is near.
He Who gives them daily manna,
He Who listens when they cry;
Let Him hear the loud hosanna
Rising to His throne on high.

Savior, if of Zion’s city,
I through grace a member am,
Let the world deride or pity,
I will glory in Thy Name.
Fading is the worldling’s pleasure,
All his boasted pomp and show;
Solid joys and lasting treasure
None but Zion’s children know.

I am waiting for the dawning of the bright and blessed day,
When the darksome night of sorrow shall have vanished far away,
When forever with the Saviour, far beyond this vale of tears
I shall swell the song of worship through the everlasting years.

I am looking at the brightness - see it shineth from afar,
of the clear and joyous beaming, of the Bright and Morning Star;
Through the dark grey mist of morning do I see its glorious light;
Then away with every shadow of this sad and weary night,

I am waiting for the coming of the Lord who died for me;
Oh, His words have thrilled my spirit: I will come again for thee.
I can almost hear his feet at the threshold of the door;
And my heart is beating faster now; as I know I shall be with him forevermore!

I do love my church. By the way, do click on the link to my church in my sidebar, as they now upload the sermons, and I'm confident they will be a blessing to you if you have some time free to listen.

By way of catharsis

This is something which has been bothering me for weeks now, and in the midst of lots of other things, I find myself needing to blog, in a way I haven't felt for a long time. When I first started blogging, it was partly about having somewhere to write down the things I turned over endlessly in my mind, so that hopefully, my mind could leave them be for a while. So here goes.

If you believe that abortion is a woman's choice, and that it should not be made illegal, you are pro-choice. You likely hold the label with pride. I think you're dead wrong, but I'm happy for you to label yourself like that for the sake of clarity in discussion. I think it's kind of ironic given how many times I hear women about to have abortions say 'I haven't really got any choice', but that's neither here nor there.

If you 'personally disagree' with abortion, but you still feel that it is a woman's choice, and should not be made illegal, you are pro-choice. It is disingenuous to redefine the label 'Pro-life' to include the global reduction of poverty, wider access to health care, extreme pacifism, and whatever other idea you have which you think will make some human lives better.

Firstly because you have your little positive-spin label. 'Choice' is your big selling point, and you're welcome to it. For those that know that making the killing of the unborn illegal would stop the vast majority of it, our main plus point is Life. None of us pretend that it would stop poverty, murder, illness, war, or any of the other things which human beings suffer from - but it would mean that literally millions of lives would be saved. We claim the label Life, and we do so with millions of good reasons.

But secondly, and this is the thing that is really bugging me today. When you who are effectively pro-choice, even though you seem unwilling to own the label, redefine pro-life so that you may still support abortion (oh, for others, of course) you are suggesting that those of us who still maintain a definition of 'pro-life' that means something, do not want an end to those other things.

You are suggesting that those who work to end the legal madness that allows a mother to have her child killed, essentially for any reason, do not care about poverty, or war, or any of the other things you cram under the now pointlessly loose 'Life' term, and do nothing about those things, while you, in your largesse, in your magnanimity, you care about all those things.

One of the things that occurred to me in these days after the US election, is how many people appear to believe that we cannot legislate to end abortion - oh, but we can legislate to end poverty, war, hey, even illness, now that embryonic stem cell research is likely going to be funded by US taxes. And those who hold the traditional 'pro-life' view are called unrealistic?

Addendum: Unrelated to this post, but I wanted to highlight it because it's one of the best things I've read post-election, this may help some of my readers who don't quite understand why there are Americans who aren't cartwheeling themselves into raptures over the result.

Grieving, but not as those without sure hope.

Leslie Stokes

His lord said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’

on a couple of things I'm not sure I'll ever understand.

I don't think I'm ever going to get my head around the reasoning a Christian goes through to get to the conclusion that the killing of unborn children can be dangerous, so we should make it safer. That we should make it completely legal, and then do our very best to talk women out of it.

Or that we should lobby government to take our money and then give it to our neighbours. I missed that verse that says 'the government should love your neighbour for you'. I missed it so completely that I'm completely baffled by Christians thinking that it's more important to lobby government to do the things the church is called to do than it is to lobby government to do the things it is called to do (like, you know, enforce the Godly rules that killing children is wrong).

It does no good to tell me that you know someone who is poor and can't afford something, and that is why you are voting for someone who you think will do something for them. Why aren't you doing something for them?

God bless America. Lord have mercy.