Today has been a mixed bag. A few moments of memory loss, medication induced, so I can't tell you about them because I don't remember. It happened last week while I was making a banana loaf. I came down the following morning prepared to make it and found one already half eaten on the cutting board. Couldn't remember a single solitary thing about making it.
Oh these bright spots of excitment. We did baking again today, mostly with me taking a very hands off supervisor role while Eden rallies the troops, giving them all jobs to do. She's a wonderful eight year old, responsible, but fun with it too. She'll be a great mum.
Funnily enough, she's not automatically thinking of that thought. She knows it's an option for her, but she's also quite prepared that God might call her to be single. She has good single role models to aspire to. It's quite humbling, especially as one of her stated intentions is 'some sort of missionary work, like Amy Carmichel'.
Mood wise, I've coped with a full day, which is a big old acheivement tick on the wall for me. It's the beginning of lent, and though I don't follow the anglican church year, I have decided to fast from sugar as it rather goes with the challenge to turn from sin that my book is exhorting me too. A bit of self-denial never hurt anyone, and I hear tell it does some good. Can't hurt my waistline either. I did do a bit of running on the spot in my tracksuit yesterday, not sure it counts :-D
2/17/2010
A mixed bag
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8 comments:
"A bit of self-denial never hurt anyone"
Nope.
And the Holy Spirit likes to help us along with our different fastings, I have found. Our Lord is as full of His loveingkindness and mercy as the Atlantic Ocean is full of water.
I'm not a follower of the church calendar per se, either, but I've decided to practice self-denial in the area of my greatest weakness: french fries and potato chips. Or as you may call them, chips and crisps.
I ran up and down the stairs a few times, and I think it counts, so your jogging on the spot counts, too.
That has to be unsettling to find you are missing some hours from your memory. Just think, in our glorified bodies we won't have any health issues and we won't have to worry about our waistlines. Of course, those things pale in comparison to the sheer joy of being in the presence of Jesus Christ...FOREVER!
Just wanted to let you know...I've been a silent reader of your blog for quite a while, but I'm not sure I've ever commented. I am praying for you with the difficulties you've been so open to share. I hope the sugar fast will help some, too!
Hi Kay,
Been reading your blog for a while now. I cannot presume to know your sufferings but I was given a psychiatric diagnosis while in my thirties, followed by 20 plus years of medications. Please take this thought from my heart to yours, in Christ's love : have you ever considered that the medications may be making you worse? They were me, but it took years to figure that out. If you are interesed in pursuing that thought I can point you toward some resources, starting with the books of Dr. Peter Breggin. I will be praying...I know exactly what it is like to have to depend upon the Lord for each breath and each moment of sanity.
Thanks Barbara, I'll look him up, but I'm quite content with medication for the time being, as it's not making me worse - quite the reverse. I know it's a two-edged sword, though, and I'm always quite happy to read about other options.
Hi Kay,
My wife's been on psychiatric medication too, for 20+ years. I'm sure that some people are put on such medication too quickly and it just exacerbates a problem; and that may be the case with Barbara. But we've learned the hard way that Elaine's medication works for her, and we've learned to be very grateful to God for it.
Hi Kay,
I had 15 years of psych meds that, by the grace of Jesus I am free of and recovering from now. I ended up on multiple medications and in bed with fibromyalgia for 5 years. I believe the side effects of the psych meds caused the fibro because now I have no fibromyalgia symptoms or pain whatsoever. I also had memory "blackouts". I now look back on homeschooling my son through those years, and I have very little memory of those precious years. I trust in the sovereignty of God, and He has used this suffering in my life for His glory, but please, dear sister, consider the possibility that the medications are not the "gift from God" that some people claim they are. I cannot tell you how painful it is to look at photographs of my son through those years and have absolutely no memory of them. I am praying for you.
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